Thursday, January 17, 2013
Why start this Blog?
I was born to be a warrior for some reason. Born in the Balboa Naval Hospital in San Diego when my Dad was stationed in Yuma AZ with the Air Force and they had no base hospital. When we traced our family roots it points to Attila the Hun, so I guess it's in my blood. I begged my parents to let me join Scouts, because they had uniforms, but my Dad who left the AF after one 4-year hitch liked sports so I was in the YMCA programs instead. Next I begged my parents to send me away to a military school. I discovered them while looking through my friend's Boys Life (scouting) Magazine. Of course, they said no because they didn't want to pay for school when their taxes already paid for my Elementary school in Los Angeles. At 17, I begged them to let me drop-out of school and enlist in the Marine Corps. I could tell that the Vietnam War would be over for the US before I could graduate high school in 1973. I joined the Air Force in 1975 this time with my wife's permission. Together, we spent 30 years in the military and reared 5 kids during that time. After retirement, I tried civilian life for a year and half before I accepted an offer from a private military contractor, to lead a security force of former military men. I did 2 1/2 years in Afghanistan after that as a military advisor. Next, I spent another year in Afghanistan with the 10th Mountain Division as the commander's Afghan cultural advisor. I loved working with the infantry, patrolling the villages of Afghanistan. When I returned from combat, I found the adjustment to life in the US difficult. Living on the edge between life and death is a rush! I can't lie to you, as someone has said "You've never lived until you've almost died." Traffic jams, shopping, watching TV, is no comparison and can drive an amped up warrior crazy. It was very difficult not to sign-up for another combat tour but I knew it was time to stay with my family in the US. Many warriors returning from combat turn to alcohol and substance abuse, high-risk sports, motorcycle riding or other adrenalin-producing activities to replace the rush of combat. I am a combat stress therapist, working on my doctorate in psychology to treat warriors with stress injuries. This blog will be about the warrior life and fathering two of my biggest passions.
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
Mr Etzler,
ReplyDeleteI enjoyed reading your blog and agree with most everything you stated. I served 14 years in the Army Infantry and two tours in Iraq. I was wounded both times and came very close to dying on both occasions. I was a Platoon Sergeant both times over there and there is no feeling like being responsible for young warriors lives. The first time I was wounded my patrol was hit by a suicide VBIED and beside myself 4 of my soldiers were wounded with 1 dying. He was one of my squad leaders and a good friend. We were standing within 10 feet of each other and I live with the guilt of why him and not me every day. The second time fortunately I was the only one injured as an IED went off right under my seat. The injuries I suffered from this one was a broken back, shattered jaw, and just an overall butt whipping. I fought to get back over there within 3 months because my boys needed me. During the time I was gone One of my boys got killed and I also live with the guilt of not being there for him and blame myself. I only lasted 3 months before my unit sent me back home because me body could not hold up. After being sent back home another one of my boys was killed and again I blame myself for not being there.
I was medically discharged shortly after that in 2008. I did turn to alcohol for a while but after almost losing my wife and family I was able to cut back. I have not been able to get rid of my guilt or anger and this is starting to cause a lot of problems. I do not know how to control it at times and I also like you stated am always trying to find that adrenaline rush. I work out constantly putting my body in more pain because I feel I deserve it and it helps to make me feel alive. If you have any advice for me it would be greatly appreciated.
Sincerely
Med Dis SFC Stricklin
SFC Stricklin,
DeleteThank you for all that you have done and your many sacrifices! I bet you are feeling horrible about losing your boys and probably feeling like nobody understands. Many of us have felt that aweful feeling of not being able to save them and it really hurts. I would love to talk with your further about it. Maybe we could email each other? etzlerm@gmail.com
Hurting for you brother!!
Mike